Yesterday was a difficult day, 2 years since the passing of my wonderful mother. I spent the day reflecting while burying myself in work as a distraction. It's certainly eye opening how time can pass so very quickly without allowing time for any kind of healing. I've spent these two years wishing things had never happened the way they did while also slowly forgetting and locking away the memories. How time can work both in your favour and against you is quite strange.
Days like that certainly dig up those feelings and put them at the front of my mind. It's hard to think of all the wonderful things I'll be doing with my life in the next year and not having my mother there to witness any of it. Sometimes it's easy to feel like this is only happening to me but I try and remind myself that there are so many people at the same time going through exactly what my family did. It's not consolation that another family is suffering, rather puts my mind in check as far as feeling pessimistic about my own experiences.
I live my life every day with a smile and try to approach every situation with a positive attitude. If these two years have taught me anything, it's that time will fly by regardless of whether you are miserable and sad or a bucket of smiles, so I want to make every attempt to spread smiles. Negativity is as contagious as positivity and it's so easy to hurt someone or bring them down when we ourselves are negative.
I miss my mom every day but I also know that she wouldn't want any of us still suffering so I try to remember that. She was truly an amazing woman and I'll always remember how many fabulous memories I was lucky enough to make with her.